


Too Bad His Heart Wasn't Bulletproof.

by Juanitastar



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Best Friends, Crushes, Drunkenness, Fuckbuddies, Haikyuu!! Manga Spoilers, M/M, Mentions of Tendou Satori - Freeform, Post-Time Skip, Romantic Comedy, Sex Talk, They arent really that drunk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-08
Updated: 2020-05-08
Packaged: 2021-03-02 17:21:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24080509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Juanitastar/pseuds/Juanitastar
Summary: Sugawara whines about his current sex-life (or lack thereof) while Daichi doesn’t really feel bad about it. He has his reasons.
Relationships: Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi
Comments: 9
Kudos: 25





	Too Bad His Heart Wasn't Bulletproof.

**Author's Note:**

> I always confused with my own writing. I mean, maybe there is angst? Maybe? 
> 
> Ah, manga spoilers? This is supposed to be after the time-skip so there is that.
> 
> Enjoy!

Sometimes, Sugawara would text Daichi for an “emergency drunkfest”. That normally would be if he was really stressed about something or very angry about something. Or just in the mood for it. Sugawara wasn’t the perfect adult some ~~fools~~ people thought he was.

Their point of reunion would be a bar near his apartment, because he would be barely able to walk by the time he finish whining about everything. And the times he wasn’t totally smashed by the end? They would fuck. That’s why they wouldn’t invite Asahi, the traitor in a lovingly long-distance relationship. The nerve of that guy. 

It was a really simply thing for them to do: they meet after work at the bar, they took a table and just started drinking. Now, they were tree beers into their happy reunion, so it was time to bring out the misery.

So Suga let out the biggest whine Daichi had heard him utter since his last voice message (this morning).

“I want to have sex, so, so much…” he whined as he let himself fall on the table. “I haven’t had any since last month.”

“That’s so sad,” Daichi replied, not feeling sad at all. If anything, he couldn’t stop himself from thinking ´ _nice´._

Sugawara let out another whine before starting his ramble of the night:

“Shut up. I spent all my days with those little gremlins whom I love very much. They barely respect me. They do what they want and half of them are crushing on me. The other half are dumb as hell and most of all, they all think I’m boring. Is like high school all over again, but this time I’m you… oh no, I became you! This is truly rock bottom.”

“Why I’m friends with you? I just can’t remember right now,” Daichi said, taking a sip of his beer, while on his mind he completed his phrase with an _“I prefer to be your husband, you know.”_

But Sugawara didn’t read minds, so he only answered to what he actually said.

“Shut up. I’m drunk; anything I say can’t be used against me. Anyways, I want to suck dick.”

Daichi was about o take another sip, but his hand stopped on his tracks, which was a good because he would have spat the drink back off. That was particularly crude for the first fifteen minutes of them being there.

“Okay?” he replied, because what else could he say.

“Like, if a hot guy come to me right now and was like: ´Open your mouth and swallow my cock, bitch´, I would fall in love.” Sugawara continued, letting out a wishful sigh.

“That’s deep,” Daichi said, imagining himself saying that line and them feeling like he should turn his badge just for imagining something so crude towards a children's teacher.

“Did you know the last guy I fucked was Tendou? Tendou. That freak probably cursed me to chastity,” Suga said, with a tone serious enough that made Daichi believe he was seriously considering that theory.

“I remember you telling me you had like, four orgasm with him,” Daichi said, trying to not sound petty or disgruntled. Pft, four orgasms, so what? He could… okay, maybe not, but he would totally stay after sex for cuddles. And a cup of coffee… And maybe a breakfast. Definitely a breakfast. Oh, and a conversation about the future and their insecurities while holding hands. He could go for one of those right now. 

But again, Suga couldn’t read minds, so he just keep talking about Tendou.

“Yes and he got four orgasm too, just in case. But that bastard never called me back. Do you know what he did after the sex? He just got up, took his camera and left with a _´that was fun, see ya´_ ,” Sugawara made sure to put a mocking tone on those last words. “Not even a _'thank you for sleeping with my lanky, creepy ass that only very weir people with weir kinks can stand.”_

“He is probably busy,” Daichi said, because he was a fool that needed to defend the innocent. And he just accepted the fact that Sugawara was an amateur porn star, along with like, half the people he knew from high school. “Does he still post videos on his OnlyFans?”

“Yes, but mine is on his webpage for free,” Suga said with disgust. “That bastard thinks I’m not enough to be a pay for view! He really knows how to make someone plots his murder!”

“Huh, he really likes pissing you off,” Daichi said, more as an afterthought than an actual comment. He almost add “I think he also likes you”, but he wasn’t about to shoot himself in the foot. Daichi knew a crushing fool when he saw one. He had practice identifying them by looking at himself in the mirror every morning. The same mirror that had a picture of Suga on the side that never failed to make him smile. 

“Lest not talk more about the devil, shall we?” Sugawara finally said, taking more of his drink and eyeing the one on Daichi’s hands. “And enough about me; what about you, official? When was the last time you had some dick in your mouth?”

Daichi cleared his throat, blush covering his cheeks and not because of the alcohol.

“You’re a very crude drunk person, Suga. But to answer your really invasive question: three months.”

That made Sugawara perk up, looking at Daichi like he just asked his hand in marriage.

“Three months?! Are you training to be a nun or something?” He asked with a laugh.

Daichi quickly moved the hand with his drink so that Suga couldn’t steal it, taking a quick sip before continuing:

“When you got a job like mine, you learn that hands are way less problematic than people.” Daichi said, because talking about jerking off to your crush was not crazy at all.

“That’s a fair point,” Conceded Suga. “And since you are very predictable, I already know the last dick was Bokuto or Kuroo, so I won’t pry on that.

“Both”

“What?”

Daichi looked at Suga with a mischievous smile, making him gasp when the realization hit him.

“Last time was two dicks at the same time. Both of them,”

“You’re such a disgusting slut!” Sugawara yelled, hitting the table with both hands. “I’m so jealous! I need dick!”

See, at this point, Suga was being way too noisy and Daichi was feeling way too bold. So he just say it:

“Suga, want to do it with me?”

“Finally you get the hint!” Sugawara said as he got up, slapping enough money on the table to cover for one extra drink they didn’t had time for. “Let’s go!”

Daichi let himself be dragged out of the bar, laughing when Sugawara loudly proclaimed he could and should use the handcuffs. They stumbled out of the bar, not caring for looks or comments because why would they care about anything else?

Talking, smiling, drinking together, having sex from time to time… that was the relation they had now. In the eyes of a stranger, it was the story of a guy crushing on his-high school romance and a lovely young-man who was also a slut (that was how Kuroo described, because of course he would put it that way). And all his friend had the exactly same advice for him:

Confess, they say. Stop being so emotionally available for him, they say. Grow a pair, they say.

But Daichi was fine with how things were. He really was. Despite all his whining, Suga was happy with his life; surrounded by love from friends and children and sex from his lovers and strangers. More than one time he had whined about how hard was to be in a relationship right now, so, why on earth would Daichi burden him with his feelings?

Because before being the person he longs for the most, Sugawara was his friend. His best friend. And Daichi would take a damn bullet for his best friend.

“Hey, now that I know how you feel about threesomes, want to invite Tendou next time?” Sugawara happily asked when they were in the way to his apartment. “I know he thinks you’re hot. We can team-up to destroy that smug smile of his face!”

“If you’re in, I’m too.”

Even if the bullet was aimed to his heart.

**Author's Note:**

> Aaaahg! I get so nervous about writing in my second language! If you see orthographic mistakes or weird phrases, do tell me! Love to correct those!


End file.
